Doodle or Die

Watching the sunset at the beach, Alien feels like no one will ever make her chest burst.

Jealous of her foliage, the elm tree tells the pine to get a life. The pine responds with a hearty "fuck off" and eats nachos.

Doodle or Die

When spontaneous combustion occurs at the gay strip club, there's always a sexy fireman to put it out.

Doodle or Die

Even after falling on hard times, the Easter bunny found love with a younger woman.

Doodle or Die

Teletubbies are, in fact, the horrible offspring of E.T. and an iPhone.

Them Hazzard dolphin boys got out of control, dumping the bodies off pretty blond girls in the swamp.

Doodle or Die

O give me a home, where the Power Gloves roam...

On the distant planet of New Wyoming, bison spearmen guard the galaxy's supply of kryptonite.

Doodle or Die

With the waning popularity of poker, the Bond franchise falls back on a new card game: Go Fish.

Here comes Trolly Boo Boo!

Doodle or Die

Santa's cookie addiction led him to a life of petty theft.

Doodle or Die

The black widow longed to become an olympic diver.

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We won't ever post to your Twitter or Facebook and we won't spam your friends. That's what the jerks do, and we're not jerks.

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