Dante, the crappy Spartan. Wait, Spartan's weren't black. YOU LYING FUCK.

As Gandalf continues to pull anal beads out of Frodo, Frodo begs for death. Gandalf reaches towards his erect...seriously, what the fuck.

We kill the batman with a dismembered foot, possibly one from an Asian man or someone who has jaundice. Also, the batman must be armless.

The carrot gang continues to wreak havoc on the streets of Chinatown. They are currently attacking the disabled bananas.

Damnit! Someone found their way into my porn stash. No one was supposed to know about my love of bacon-flavored tranny dicks!

The atheist is angry because the Christian, despite knowing that it's Christmas, only brought him a nice day, not a present.

Hello sir, could we spare a minute of your time? Have you accepted elephant Jesus as your lord and savior?

A rainbow heart that has just been spotted by a guard. Heart? Heart!? HEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAART!

I SAID INSECT, NOT INCEST.

Batman throws God a pair of headphones so God can listen to Batman's "sick new mixtape." It actually really sucks, but God won't tell him.

A pigman sits by a campfire, roasting his father's remains. Come morning, he shall feast on delicious bacon and become a real human boy.

When no one was looking, Lex Luthor sucked twenty dicks. He sucked twenty dicks. That's as many as two tens. And that's terrible.