That is not minecraft.
The mojang office.
I connot even begin to describe this, so how about steve going dolphin-riding.
Skeleton shoots a feceless steve until he looks like a porcupine.
cruel spider jockey.
Headless enderman named Dek
Ninja Steve killed chickens and threw them off a cliff
A chest full of diamonds
Peaceful cave next to a grassland
Tap dancin' creeper
FALLING!
Zombie's face got burned off.