Roofus thought his day could not get any worse. That's when the pirates showed up.

Salvador Dalhi's "green lawn and white picket fence"

In reality, Dumbledore's magic was pretty lackluster.

Milton was moments away from being the first person to win a golf tournament using a shovel instead of clubs.

The USA and Mexico came to an understanding over their borders after a freak flood killed Gary.

The poorly trained nurse tried to fix the boys broken arm by putting leeches on it.

Farewell poop ocean. I sail to rejoin my grey people in my orange boat.

Nobody is buying lemonade from the lemonade stand.

Bruce was embarrassed when he lost a boxing match with Roo Kangaroo.

France and Iran form a new friendship after cooperating to build the first radioactive candy cane.

World's best hammer lies forgotten and unused.

Sheriff Puppy never gets taken seriously. )=