I love you, flying hamburger, but your home is over there.

A flying KitKat robot ate all the Google candy that I bought at Safeway, and I have the receipt to prove it!

Help! I have tortilla chips stuck in my beard!

A microscopic red ping pong ball is trapped in my one of my cells as it undergoes mitosis.

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We won't ever post to your Twitter or Facebook and we won't spam your friends. That's what the jerks do, and we're not jerks.

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