The correct way to talk to short people

nice hat, did you get it from the dork store?

Well, that's one way to nose your gun.

WROOOOONG! There are clearly two of you dumbasses. Learn to count

a dead horse

I really, really, REALLY hope Santa brings me dog tampons this year.

Shadow the Hedgehog is alarmed that Tom the Cat has been murdered

Tomorrow set a treehouse on fire.

A bird eating the last thing you ate

Happy birthday, pupper! I got you a seductive chewing gum yeti that can use its own eyeballs as projectile weapons!

For what are leaves but countless blades To fight a countless foe on high.

Sanctions, mandates, regulations … These things mean nothing to the natural world.