My ex refusing to go down on me, and saying that I must do it instead.

30,000 points to Hufflepuff! You win!

A flower asking politely to not receive oral sex from a giraffe.

Leafless carrots are getting married. The female carrot as put on some weight, clearly displeasing the male carrot.

A time paradox.

Holy shit a talking sun!

I THREW IT ON THE GROUND!

Death note kills someone who is too easy? I guess they don't like the promiscuous.

Some gay British band.

Two flamboyant boxes (one orange and one purple) gossip about boxy things. The purple one has a purse.

The idiots guide to getting choice ass. The review says "This book made me get a great ass."

The hulk is getting high on a fat joint.