potato wants to join the Marines but Sergeant doesn't let him cause it's a potato

Mr. potato wishes to join the Marines but cannot, for he is a potato

Patriotic potato sheds a tear over MURICA

Terd tearing up because the USA has been shrunk to a disproportional size :(

Feces believes that the USA is tiny compared to bacteria.

Two piles of dog-poo wearing baseball gloves indicate that the USA is inferior to bacteria

turds.

A snowman made out of feces wiggles his arms out in joy as he slides down a cliff.

Shit snowman going down the slope